I couldn’t believe it when my friend showed me the post-card. “Every six weeks,” she explained, “We get a reminder that it’s our turn to serve in the church nursery.” The problem? They hadn’t been to that church in years! The church had even updated this family’s address in its database, but never caught on to the fact that they had moved two states away.

I vowed to never allow this to happen (actually, I half-jokingly threatened our nursery coordinator to never let this happen). But it also reminded me about ways that I’ve poorly communicated with others — whether volunteers, parents, or other ministry leaders.

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I am often asked what to look for in a small group leader in children’s ministry.

While there are many qualities that those who fill this position should have, there is one that stands out above the rest for me.  A small group leader should be a great listener.

Yes I believe that a small group leader should have a vibrant realtionship with God, spend time in His word, and be passionate about sharing Jesus with kids. Those are all very important.

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For the past few weeks I’ve been writing about some of the things I’m thankful for. I recently saw a post on a friend’s facebook which made me stop and think about thankfulness. . .

So . . . yes, I’m thankful, but do I take time every day to thank God for His many, many blessings in my life?  This caused me to ask myself a few questions . . . (more…)

In our Children’s Ministry, we developed a volunteer role called “Coaches,” and we’ve had the opportunity to share these ideas with other churches. This volunteer structure can be incredibly useful in your ministry, whether you have 30 or 60 or 200 or 800 volunteers. And keep in mind that this type of structure is not just applicable for churches and children’s ministries, but any type of organization that is volunteer-dependent and where leadership development is a goal.

What Volunteer Coaches Do

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EDITOR’S NOTE: We would like to welcome Joey Espinosa to the Kidmin1124 team.  We are certain that you will find his contributions to be useful and illuminating.  Please take a second to welcome Joey by commenting on this article below.

I work in an after school program with two other people (all of us part-time) and a handful of volunteers. As with most ministries, we are highly dependent on our volunteers to have an impact on the children who come and who want to come.  In fact, we currently have a waiting list due to an insufficient amount of leaders.

Recently, in a discussion about volunteers in our program, someone told me that we need to treat all volunteers the same. According to this logic, because all volunteers give something, they are equally valuable, and should be given parallel responsibilities and privileges.

I disagree!

Volunteers do have equal value, but that’s because value is intrinsically from the God who created us and saved us.

But volunteers are also different. They have:

• Different strengths,
• Different levels of responsibility, and
• Different rewards.

Therefore, they should not all be treated the same.

Different Strengths

Volunteers with unique skills, experiences, and passions should contribute in specific ways. The failure to recognize and act on this principle is one of the biggest mistakes a leader can make. It’s one way that I erred for years in ministry. I would see a need and then look for any warm body to fill it.

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While most kidmin policies and procedure manuals will contain detailed instructions of what to do in the case of a fire or other emergency at your church, few give you instructions on the best way to handle those fires that are “metaphoric” rather than literal.  But in the ministry world, and especially when dealing with kids, I have found that I have needed to address burning situations far more often that I have had to put out bags of burning microwave popcorn that has been cooking for 33.00 rather than 3.30 minutes.  (FYI.  Popcorn will burn, as in, flame, in a microwave and the smell takes 3 days to clear.  Don’t ask me how I know.)

If you haven’t had to put out “fires” in your ministry yet, you must be a new children’s leader, or you are leading alone.  People working together, rubbing elbow to elbow, are certain to eventually cause enough friction that you will need to address.  So, when these situations occur, I go back to the basics that we learned in kindergarten;

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I am a second chair leader.

When someone first mentioned this to me, I immediately went back to my band days in school. If you were second chair in band, that meant that there had been a competition and you had lost your chance at first chair. Everyone’s goal was to be first chair and there was a weekly competition for it. That isn’t this kind of second chair experience.

According to Mike Bonem and Roger Patterson, authors of the book Leading from the Second Chair, the definition of a second chair leader is “a person in a subordinate role whose influence with others adds value throughout an organization.”

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We all have heard, probably more times than we need, the analogy of our life or ministry being a plate.  We sometimes say our plates are full or we need to take something off our plate.  But more often than taking things off, I find myself putting things on, or wishing that I could.  With time and age comes better judgment, and I have learned that I can’t do more than I can do.  Just like eating at the buffet, piling more food on a plate that’s full has two consequences.  First, everything starts to taste the same because it all runs together.  And, second, no matter how good the food is if you eat it all you will be sick.  Ministry is no different.  You can only effectively do so much.  So, the answer is to share, which though it’s not allowed at buffets, thankfully, it is what you need to do in ministry.  But releasing ministry is not as simple as it sounds.  Recently I have gone through a season of needing to release ministry and I have found these differentials have to be made when you do.

There is a difference between releasing ministry and dropping it.

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Ok, I know that I am probably the only children’s pastor/worker/ministry leader that has ever done this, but I am going to share anyway just in case. When I took over our children’s ministry and our children’s church, the Pastor and I had a big vision. After spending some time developing this vision into something I felt like I could communicate clearly, I attacked it like an NFL line backer attacks the quarterback. Pushing aside any lineman that might stand between me and my goal, I gave it my all. This worked great, until…..well, until I got tired.  A couple of weeks ago, I was watching the Tampa Bay Buccaneers play a football game. One of the safeties caught an interception and ran it all the way back, 91 yards, for a touchdown. This was a very exciting play to watch. The Bucs took the lead, and this player took the bench. This worked out ok, because there was another player there to take his place while he recovered from his long sprint. When I took over the children’s ministry I hit it with the same energy as this player running for the end zone. The problem was there was no one to stand in for me while I recovered, and I couldn’t run full speed towards the end zone for an indefinite period of time. This led to a lot of stress and a lot of frustration for me.

I think that this is a trap that many of us fall into at some point during our ministry. For me it was something that my pastor said that ultimately saved me from this frustration. Isn’t it cool how great men and women of God can minister to you without even trying; and often without even knowing it. Isn’t it great how God will give you just the words you need, when you need them the most? Anyways, we were at an evangelism training event at a local church.  As we stood around talking with different pastors before the event started, we spoke with one in particular that shared how he was somewhat frustrated by the amount of stuff that needed to be done and the slowness with which progress seemed to come. My pastor looked at him and said the words that changed my ministry forever. He told this pastor that he was in it for the long haul; that he planned to die at this church. He said once you put it in a long term perspective, the pressure to get things done quickly goes away.

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I think that generally when we think of discipleship, we too often associate it with having someone in our lives to encourage us and empower us. I think having a mentor is important, but I also believe that being a mentor is equally important.

One generation shall commend your works to another, and shall declare your mighty acts. Psalm 145:4

I think the lessons we teach in children’s ministry are  important, but I also believe we have so much more to offer these kids. Being involved in the lives of the kids outside of Sunday mornings is something I am very passionate about. As Paul walked with Timothy, I believe we are called to walk with the next generation(s) following us. They need to see us living out what they are being taught on Sunday mornings.

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